It’s Sunday evening currently, and I am in a Premier Inn in Sheffield, on a trip to see one of my sister’s. The news is bleakly on in the background, trying to drown out the noise made by the electricity, which seems to really bug me…
Anyhow, I’m going off-piece.
Throughout 2019 I found I struggled a lot with, well… most things really. I’m not sure about you, but 2019 was just a weird year. It started off shit, and then ended shit too… But one thing that really stood out to me for my personal growth within this year was how much I struggled with my image, and weight.
Now, for anyone who doesn’t know, I am of a tall, slim build. I have a natural thigh gap – which I can’t remember not having – and very prominent bones. Whilst I suppose many would think I would be happy with my figure, I’ve struggled with it constantly since I was 11. I have had a very weird relationship with myself – and food – over all these years, and it was in 2019 that I just had enough of feeling like this.
I think there was a photo of myself that someone took, and I looked at it, and I had seen how much weight I had lost throughout this year. Now, for someone who has always been underweight, noticeably losing weight still was not something I could let happen. That’s when something switched.
I don’t know why I’ve always been obsessed with my body, and the way it looks, but I know it needs to end.
So, welcome to my journey to health, with a lot of miscellaneous things thrown in there.
My plan is to focus on eating healthier, working out more, and just getting myself to a position where I feel confident, happy, and just overall healthy. I am tired of being tired, of being in pain, and having such low energy, so this is the year where I am setting attainable goals, to get myself to a better place.
To anyone else on the same journey as me (or even a different journey), good luck, don’t give up, but remember that you only get out what you put in.
Alexandra Grace XxXx
It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.Confucius